Great Britain-map-fun

The first class I had with my group of kids after Christmas, was an English class. I wished them a happy New Year and asked them to tell the class one nice thing that happened between Christmas and New Year. Some kids talked about the friends they visited. Most of the kids mentioned what they got for Christmas; money, iphones, clothes, skies, playstation games. Two of the kids with Muslim background giggled and mention something about nice food. One kid said: "We spent over 10400 kroners on firework". I didn’t believe my ears and had the child repeat what he had said. It was true; his family had spent about 1750 USD on firework.

To introduce the chapter of The British Isles, I printed out large outline maps of the UK and Ireland, smaller maps of Wales, Scotland, Ireland, England and Northern Ireland. The students are already sitting in groups, so I had the seven groups focus on different countries and plot the names of cities on the big outline map. I told the kids that when I google image searched for maps, I got a really strong image in my head of the British Isles looking like a dinosaur being chased by something. The students laughed and tilted their heads, trying to see what I saw. As I walked around to see how they were doing, I noticed that one group had seen the dinosaur and drew teeth and arms on the Great British Island.

The group that got to Wales as their focus area was finished early. Creative as they were, they started making jokes about the country of Wales, based on the place names. I walked over to their table and was asked: “Where can you see swans in Wales?” – In Swansea. “Where is a safe place for fish?” – Fishguard. “What do the Welsh people say instead of ‘Oh my god’?” – Holyhead.

“Why don’t any people live here?”, one boy asked, pointing at the middle of Wales. I explained that there are mountains for hiking in the middle. The student looked up with a glance of innocence and said: “No, it’s because there are WHALES there”.

indoors firework

I started the class by telling my students: “Use of firework on the school’s property will lead to expulsion and in severe cases; police report and financial reimbursement!” Three minutes later we walked downstairs to the basement and found the corridor covered in smoke. Some of the kids got hysterical, coughing and wondered what it was. Two students crawled around on the floor, pretending to slowly pass out. I unlocked the door to the room we were going to be in and hushed my pupils inside.

Annoyed I went to get the inspector, and on my way back downstairs, one of my kids came weeping towards me. He claimed his asthma was kicking in and he couldn’t breathe. Calmly and sternly I led him to the library and told him to read a book in there. The inspector got the ventilation going again, and he inspected the smoke bomb shell that was now broken in several pieces. I could hear from behind the door, that my students said they know who threw the bomb. We examined three of the kids, but they didn’t want to tell on each other.

What was intended to be a fun class with games and teambuilding, turned out to be a class where the students had to write a log over what they have heard of rumours. How ironic that shortly after I told them about the repercussions of firework on school property, the students experienced why firework is prohibited. Hopefully the inspector gets enough information from the student log I handed over to him, and the smokebomb sinner gets expelled. First day of school after the Christmas break :-S

getting ready for a new semester

The Christmas break is over. Over a week of sleeping in, going to bed late, watching movies and eating candy is over. The new year has started, and as tradition goes; January 1st was mainly spent in bed. Today, I practiced getting up early and went to work. It was hard to fall asleep last night, and really hard to get out of bed this morning. Even though I needed to use the bathroom, it was like the air in the bedroom forced me to stay under the covers. The heated bathroom floor called for me, and half an hour after the alarm went off, I conquered the uncanny coldness and got out of bed.

Somehow the front wheel of Min's bike is missing. I rode his bike to the gym three days after Christmas, and he put the bike in our car when he came home. The bike was taken out of the car a few days later, (the wheel has to come off in order for it to fit in the back seat), and now that wheel is missing. Looking around for something that isn't there doesn't make it appear, so I had to use my own bike, the one which rear wheel is crooked and makes peaceful biking really difficult. To make sure it wouldn't hinder forward motion too much, I dismantled the breaks.

I got to work and was, for a few hours, the only person making lessonplans for the new year. Now two male colleges have shown up, and a laughterbox of a 9th grade teacher brough her two annoying kids in. They're staggering about in their too big jackets, looking for candy at the teachers' desks. In the other workroom, I can hear a 10th grade teacher's voice talking soothingly to a complaining kid. The three kids seem to bond over their destiny as offspring of educationists, and are arranging a running contest where they yell, hum and scream simulatinously. What joy!

Clearly, my work day should be over by now. I've read up on hinduism, made 26 copies the language history assignments for 10th grade, printed out maps of England, Northern Ireland, Ireland, Scotland and Wales, plus an outline map for the 8th graders to plot in cities. I have also tried to decide what to focus on for German in 8th and 10th grade, but I will discuss it with the other German teacher tomorrow. Now I will rearrange my desk, wave bye-bye to the quarterpersons and try my luck on the bike without rear breaks.

substitute teaching yeah

I had a substitute class yesterday. It started with a fight outside the classroom and four kids blaming a small pakistani guy for starting it and bruising them badly. Inside the classroom two kids were throwing pens and markers at each other. I walked over to them and told them to stop it. Five seconds later I saw objects flying from one side of the classroom to the other. "You and you, come on out of the classroom with me". In the hallway I told them that I didn't want them in the classroom and they could spend some time with the principal. The guys refused and judging by the size of one of them, it would be very difficult to carry him downstairs to the administration.

The majority of the class were to be spent in the computer lab. I spent most of the time standing behind the guys in the last row, separating them when they started to play fight and interrupting when the insults became too bad. The big uncarriable kid didn't want to work and played computer games the entire time. He went on facebook, which is strightly prohibited, and I had no sanctions. Reprimands he has plenty of, so that threath isn't real. He didn't want to go to the principal, and couldn't lift him from his chair and drag him either. Eventually he closed down facebook and complained about being bored and school being like a prison.

"Most teachers would have freaked out and gotten real mad by now", one of the kids said. "She's pre.. Hey, are you pregnant?" I answered that no, I am not pregnant. Some of his friends gasped and asked why he would ask me such a question. The kid held his palms open and explained: "The one teacher who didn't get all upset and yelled at this class was pregnant". So I figure the kids believe that the only reason to stay calm when the class is a riot, is to have another creature living inside you. You know something is going to be a lot worse very soon. When I told Min later, he laughed and said: "I bet that kid is in for a surprise if he believes pregnant equals calm".

When the class was over I went to the inspector's office and had a debriefing. She told me that if I encounter a situation like that again, I should come get her or the principal and they can have the kids get out of the class. To me it feels like loosing face, having to get someone else to take control in the classroom. The inspector pointed out that it is not fair to the other students that two kids get all the attention. I agree, at least I am an experience richer

First day of school

My 29 kids are wonderful! They are funny, well-behaved and intelligent. Of course there are a couple of kids that struggle with motivation, but there are no chatterboxes or exhibitionistic drama kings. Usually I leave my sarcasm and irony out when I teach 8^th grade, there are so many kids that don’t get it, and I don’t want to make them uncertain of me.  I think there is one that will outsmart me if I don’t have my antennas on around him.

After handing out and explaining the 3-levelled homework sheets, I told the kids how I had a hard time studying in middle school. I did well in class, but homework was overkill. I spent hours looking at the sheet of tasks for social science, math, religion, Norwegian, etc. I used to have candles on my desk, and next to the candle I had little plastic figurines. As I got more and more frustrated, the figurines lost a leg or an arm. At this point I had the kids’ full attention and they seemed to enjoy the story of my youth.

My homework would still be undone four hours later, and I then realized I need to manage time better. What I recommended the kids was to set 20 minutes off to do science homework, then 10 minutes English and then take a little break, for instance. That way their plastic figurines would be safe and they would be more efficient while doing homework. When I asked for the kids’ advice, one kid suggested rewarding yourself after achieving a specific goal.

The very same kid that volunteered study tips walked by my desk on the way out. He had a plastic bag in his hands. Another teacher had left a candle and a vase of flowers on the desk as a welcome gesture. The kid made sure I was looking and put the plastic bag close to the burning candle and pulled it away. I started to protest, then looked at him and saw the laughter in his eyes. “Aha”, I said, “that is because I told you about me burning plastic figurines while studying, isn’t it?”

The books that the kids need for their classes were already placed on their desks. The last kid that enrolled to my school (a few days ago), was really relieved and grateful when he found that he indeed gets to lean French. The alternative is Spanish that everyone wants to learn, or German that is a bit too easy due to the transparency to Norwegian words. The kids who chose to learn French are “la crème de la crème”. The kid with a matured sarcasm is also in the French group, and I am sure there will be more stories about his wit in the weeks to come.